Monday, November 21, 2011

I'm sprawled out on the ground outside of John Tyler Elementary. The grass is wet with morning dew and the sun burns hot and high up in the sky. Birds chirp and bees buzz by.

I am in John Tyler Elementary's field. I've played soccer, I've ran around, and I've messed around, on it. Nostalgia surged in through my fingers touching the grass and crept up my spine. It refused to leave there, and I felt like the past was colliding with the present.

I get up from the ground and walk slowly over to the bleachers. I sit down upon them, and try to think. Why am I here, what's happening, what am I doing.

I'm there for what seems like hours, just sitting there, alone. I eventually start to feel a bit lonely, but I don't mind it. Loneliness is something I've learned to deal with in my life.

Then I see her. Anna, out in the field. The sun beats down upon her face and I realize that Grey was never the sun but she was and I try to reach for her.

I'm always reaching for the sun. Always. Not just Anna. I never reached for the moon, because I always had it with me. But I'm never able to grab onto it. It always either burns me, or I don't have enough strength to stretch for it.

What am I rambling on about.

I get up and walk over to her. Her smile is radiant and her hair is pushed gently away from her face by a soft wind. Her beautiful eyes greet my dark, boring eyes.

I'm nothing compared to her.

She opens her mouth to speak, but no sound comes out of it. She cannot talk. And then she starts to disappear and I try to grab onto her but she is nothing but a phantom in the Spring air and I'm nothing but a dead man walking, destined to be buried underneath the oncoming Winter's snow.

In that moment, I saw everything Anna could have been, without me. She would have grown up in a spectacular fashion, living out the American dream. She would have gone to an incredible university after high school, she would have gotten a high paying, and fun, job, she would have been so happy.

But instead she died screaming for someone, anyone, to help her. I still remember the blood.

And I remember the parents. They blamed me at first, but they knew I couldn't ever do such a thing to her, or cause something like that to happen... funny thing is, I did cause that to happen.

Everything about this is all my fault, I'm the only one to blame, I'm so so sorry.

I didn't want anything to ever turn out this way, I'm so sorry. If I could take it all back.. that's what I wanted to do. I want to die. I want to die. I want everything to end and I don't have the strength to go on because Anna was my everything and without her everything is so dull.

But my death won't bring her back. Of course not. I know that. It won't ease any of the suffering it's caused. But it will stop me from feeling this burden. I want to stop carrying so much weight. I'm responsible for the destruction of Portsmouth. I let my own hometown be consumed by evil.

I'm no worse than Grey. I am not a good man. I tried so hard to be, but I can never be one.

And I'm the only one who could have saved Anna. And FUCK. Fuck, I failed.

And the worst part Steven lost his best friend too.

Steven... he's always been there for me...

And Anna's death affected him too, didn't it?

His body shaking at the mention of her name.

Him crying at her funeral.

Sometimes I wondered about that.

Maybe he loved her too.

...he did love her too, didn't he? He wasn't comforting Anna. They were kissing, back then.

This didn't hurt me like it did back then.

He was there for her when I wasn't.

I was such a bastard back then. What the fuck was wrong with me?

I acted so much differently than I do now. Looking back at The Shower Scene...

Steven loved Anna and I was in the way of that. They loved each other. He would have been the high school sweetheart. They would drift away after school, but they would always have that spark between them...

The spark that never existed between Anna and I.

And Steven is so much stronger than I am. So much braver. He wouldn't falter when Grey would use Anna's body. He would keep on keeping on.

Unlike me. I'm useless. I'm weak. I'm stupid.

And alone.

As these thoughts clutter up my head, I fall to the ground. I bury my head in the ground, repeatedly hitting it against it. I wanted everything to just end. Kill me! I don't even care anymore!

My entire life has been a failure, a disappointment, a wreck!!!

Everything I do... it...

I'm a failure, by design, seemingly. If there's a God, he set me up to fail.

The clouds cover over the sun. I look up to the sky and just... scream. I want it to rain. I want it to rain so I could pretend I could still cry. I couldn't cry at that point. I had run out of tears. My head hurt.

Everything hurt.

I was at my lowest point. Past the point of suicidal urges and lowered moods. I was at the point of just completely losing it.

My faith, my sanity, my life; all destroyed by one miserable eldritch being. Everything, in shambles.

And I look up. The clouds move away to reveal a tiny sliver of sunlight. It falls to the ground, revealing Anna, again. She was still there?

"Anna!" I call out to her.

She approaches me. I... I...

I get up, and hug her. She's solid. She's not a ghost anymore. She's there!

"Anna, I'm so sorry, I-"

She slaps me. Hard.

"Aghwhat the fuck! What was that for?"

Her beautiful eyes say it all, but she talks anyways.

"Stop the fucking pity party and get out there!"

"But it's too late, Anna. There's no use...."

"No it's not! Don't even DARE say that to me until you drop dead! Nothing's too late!"

"Okay, fine. What if I suddenly somehow get some sort of heroic resolve and try to rescue Portsmouth? What then, Anna? How do I escape this hellhole?"

"You don't escape. You rise above it. You don't let it beat you."

"I don't follow..."

"Look. Owen, listen! What happens if you give up? Tell me!!"

"Portsmouth's dead, then. But that's going to happen even if I"

She punches me this time.

"No!! No no no!! OWEN!! YOUR FAMILY, YOUR FRIENDS, YOUR NEIGHBORS, EVERYONE YOU'VE EVER KNOWN IN YOUR LIFE ARE GOING TO DIE! Stop being so goddamn selfish and stop drowning yourself in blame! Get up now and fight! Fight until you're dead! If you won't, then I'll kill you, I swear. What happened to the boy I dated?"

She was right. I... tears finally began to come out.

"Yes. You're right. I'm sorry. What... what am I doing? Why am I so weak, Anna?"

The anger in her face seems to fade away, and she smiles.

"You're not weak. You're strong. Far stronger than anyone I know. And you're definitely not selfish in the usual sense of the word, nor are you uncaring. It's just... I get it, things start to pile up after a while. So many people you know have died... it's like there isn't anything left to fight for. But there is, and you know it. Cosette, your little sister; she's with your grandmother right this very instant, isn't she?"

I get up off the ground and dust off my jeans.

"Thank you, Anna. I'm sorry things turned out the way they did for you."

"Stop saying sorry. Start saying thank you and your welcome more. I told you that when we were dating, and I'm telling you now, bub!"

I laugh. She was as feisty as ever.

 "Hey, a question though: How are you even here right now?"

"Listen. When Grey kills someone, or even nearby, they don't just... die. Their souls, their entire being, are absorbed into him. They become one with him. It's not... not exactly a purgatory or a hell. We stop feeling, stop being conscious. But Owen... you still have a connection to Grey. A small one. A bridge. He tried to burn down that bridge a while ago, but it did not work.

You are both one still. You are both in Unison. So the souls that he's absorbed... they can resonate inside of you. Even when you're far away from Grey. Right now, you are in a maze. You're inside of the forest, but incredibly deep inside of it. You've been sealed in, just like Grey was.

But you can escape. I don't know how, but you can. I think the escape will reveal itself in time. Just.... keep fighting, okay? Promise?"

"I promise. For you. For Steven. For me. For the world."

We hug. She kissed me on the cheek, and she starts to fade away.

"My power belongs to you. My entire soul..."

It surprises me, and I tell her not to do it, but before I can, she's already gone. Inside of me.

I can feel her soul converting into energy inside of my hands. Sparks flicker on the hands, bouncing and twisting between my fingers.

Her sacrifice would not be in vain. I would honor her last words.

For Porstmouth. For all my friends. For all my comrades. For my neighbors. For the strangers.

And for the world. Grey would not escape this place.

A golden fire appears inside of my right hand. I realize it's Degausser.... I had an upgrade.

Instead of gray energy, I had golden energy.

I feel it flowing all throughout my body. I make it flare up in both of my hands...

I had an idea. I knew how to get out. It was crude, but effective.

It would be like popping a balloon. After I poked a hole in it, all the air would go rushing out.


I held my hands up high, arced my body... and then dived towards the ground, both hands crashing into the grass, degausser blazing hot. The contact between the balls of golden degaussed energy and the ground caused massive amounts of dirt to push up towards me. I ignored it, and released all of the energy I had inside of me.

I don't know what happened next. All I remember is a golden flash.

For a moment, I appear in some sort of purgatory. It felt like a dream. I was looking at someone, who was sitting in the John Tyler field. Only John Tyler wasn't on the horizon, it wasn't even built yet, it seemed.

It was Norman, only younger. What-

I'm somewhere else. I have no idea where.

And also it appears that I've been typing this entire time. I don't even know how I got this laptop.

I feel like I'm in a dream.


Saturday, November 19, 2011


I'm drowning.

I don't know where I am

I feel like I'm floating


What's happening

Why do I feel like I'm floating away

One second I was laying on my bed the next I'm

I see the rest of the 757

I'm trying to swim over to them

It's too hard

They're disappearing one by one


I'm being pulled in far deeper than they are

is this beyond everything

I blink and I see trees

I think and I see Daisy

She's trying to tell me something

She's grabbing onto me with her jaw and she's trying to pull me but

I'm alone

I'm gone

I'm done


I feel like I'm dying

I don't know where I am

I'm drowning.



The cold air bit at my fingers as I walked out of the garage, shovel in one hand and lantern in the other. Strung loosely around my fingers of the left hand holding the lantern was a drawstring to a small bag. This bag held the scorned mask. I set out into my backyard and walked to the church parking lot through the underbrush.

The cold sky night sprawled over for the first time in weeks. The grey twilight was gone, replaced with the stars and the black blanket the stars shine through. If I could have smiled, I would have. I couldn't even grin. Not even sigh. All I could do was stare at it with a slight contentment. This was misery.

I heard voices, whispering and biting at the back of my neck with their rotten, dying breath. This had been occurring since earlier that evening. They would not stop. They knew I was about to silence them. It was driving me insane. I think I would have gone over the edge if I had to bear it any longer.

I walked alongside the layer of bushes and trees that outlined the space between the parking lot and the tiny suburban sanctuary to my right. After about two or three minutes of walking, I saw the tiny church shed, composed of bricks. With the lantern's glow, I could see the familiar graffiti on the back of it.

At the top, below where the broken back window used to be (the hole had been filled with bricks now), were three sevens in a row. Insignificant to me in my childhood, insignificant to me now. However, near the bottom of the brick wall, were new signs. There was two new assortments of numbers; 444 and 417. I squinted at these numbers while the lantern glowed in my hands.

I left the shed behind, and walked into the tiny hidden forest. I had only been back here once in my life. That was when I was a kid, with my little brothers, a cousin, and a friend. We were exploring. There was a tiny stream back here, made up of sewage and groundwater. It was disgusting! We ignored that and played all around it. We ended up angering a hive of groundbees and running for our lives. We all got stung, but my little brother Alec got stung in the ear and ended up just standing around like an idiot. I ran back, grabbed him, and got out of there, despite getting stung even worse.

That moment is still engraved into my memory. That moment of pure fear... but also the love of my brother overriding that fear. Just like all the moments in the past year, where I rose above my fear and conquered it. I don't think I've ever really been afraid of Death. At least, not to the fullest extent.

Hell, I was ready to embrace it far before Grey had entered my life. I would have probably killed myself without him around. My life without Grey was still quite shitty. My mother was...

It's too late for explanations behind who I am now, isn't it?

I was reminded of the day back at Luca's house, when we walked into the forest and emerged in another universe. It felt like I was venturing into another land. The lantern seemed dimmer in this new type of darkness, this new type of shadow that darkened everything with a new found mystery.

This new area I had walked into, I did not recognize. This place was not the forest I had ran through when I was a kid. This was a large forest, that would be more at home in the mountains. A mist flowed over the grass like a carpet. It was much, much colder now. The dark whispers that had been stalking me were now accompanied by screams and moans. I bit my tongue, trying not to scream.

Sowing Season was gone. Peter Rivers' temporary defense against The Dying Man no longer worked. If I had not fought toe to toe with phantoms beforehand, I would have collapsed to the ground in a frightened heap. The sounds would not stop and in the corner of my eye I could see past the veil that separates the dead from the living and all the horrific things that sight would induce.

 My grip on the shovel tightened. My hand was bleeding. I wasn't going to falter.

A few minutes passed by, I came across a lake; shimmering under a moon made of anger and angst. This was the spot. I would bury everything here. No one would ever know. I could have just thrown it all into the river, without any care or precision, but it would become somebody's problem down the line.

No one will feel pain from this monster again. I will carry this weight. Even if it leaves me insane.

The mist cleared away near the lake, which allowed me to scope out a spot where I could bury the mask. I noticed that, almost everywhere else except one tiny area near the shoreline, there were decaying autumn leaves. I picked that spot.

I put the lantern down next to the spot, and started digging. I ignored the pain that gnawed at my hands. I ignored the biting cold. I ignored the sounds chewing at my ears. I would dig until I collapsed from exhaustion. It was the only way.

There were new sounds though. I could hear a car door slamming. I could hear heavy panting and muddy shoes slogging through the grass and dirt. I could hear cement blocks shredding against one another. I could hear the wild animals running away from the area. I could hear a man with a heavy Northern accent ordering another man around. He was pushing the other man down to the lake.

"Get down there, now. Yeah, that's right. Listen to me before I shoot you dead."

The two are at the shoreline now. One of them continues to speak.

"You really should have watched your back, yknow. The entire group has been swayed with my lies. This is my town now. And you're nothing. You will pay for the hell you brought me. You will drown in it."

I knew that it wasn't really happening, but it still felt so real. It felt like I was actually witnessing it all, without even looking at the incident actually happen or even paying any actual attention to it.

"Any last words, ...Luca Brasi?"

I was shocked when I heard that, but I kept digging anyways.

I hear cloth being ripped... possibly whatever had been shutting that man also named Luca up, and he spoke.

"You bastard, you're not getting away with this! Yo-"

A gunshot. I don't stop digging, but my hands do begin to shake.

"Shut the fuck up."

All I could hear from that Luca was a gurgling and a strange cry.

The Northern man laughs, and begins to softly whisper something.

"You never worked well with our group; not with the faults we found.

So we fixed you with cement galoshes, so no one can save you now.

Unless you have friends among fish, there will still be no air to breathe.

You could drink up the entire ocean, I'll still find someone to be everything we know that you'll never be."

If I had been in a different mood, I would have noticed he had been quoting lyrics from the band Brand New

I looked to my left and saw the ghosts of the past materialize. There was a man on the ground rolling around and writhing in pain, clutching his abdomen. Standing over him, ...was Norman Rivers.

The Northern man was Norman. He was behind everything that happened. It was the old man.

Luca.... this Luca had gotten in the way of some group. The group aimed to profit off of the Dying Man infection of this town. They got rid of Luca so he wouldn't interfere with the plan.

 Norman pushes Luca into the lake and lets him sink.

The past vanishes and I am hysterical. I decided that the hole I had dug was plenty deep and I fetch the mask from the bag. A sharp pain plunges into my arm and rips through it. I ignore it, and throw it into the hole. I sit there for a moment, to catch my breath.

A new whispering, clearer than ever before, begins behind me. I ignore it. I wasn't going to be stopped.

So touch me or don't

The whole absurdity of the situation had upset me. Norman wouldn't hurt Luca, would he? ...No, it was all a coincidence, that Luca was a different Luca. Same name, different person. It was just as absurd as Luca hurting me; it wouldn't ever happen. Not between friends.

Just let me know

The lantern's glow is upset by new shadows, but I ignore it. It was just more ghosts from the past, wasn't it?

Where you've been

I look down at the mask and give it one last, final stare. The past few seasons of pain and suffering races through my head. It's funny how fast time is. Funny how long place lasts. Teaching me time and place was a hell of a way to destroy the last bits of sanity I had left.

Or we could leave it alone...

I was about to get up and bury it, but. My shovel was no longer by my side.

I'm sure there's someone who knows

Confused, I looked to the other side of me, and then near the hole. But the lantern's glow is almost entirely extinguished and I realize that

Where you've been.

My very own shovel collides with the back of my head and I am pushed into the ground. The shovel hits me over and over again all over my body and I shout in pain. I do not get a chance to see who is hitting me in the blind flurry of sharp metal crashing against my body.

I manage to kick away the metallic end of the shovel, and I roll sideways. I get up, and kick at the figure, who was wearing a grey hoodie, just like I was. He was wearing the hood up at first... but it falls away from his face, and the sight breaks me. 


He smiles, and then smacks the shovel across my face. I fall to the ground and spit blood into the dirt. I look over and see him picking up Grey's mask... and putting it on.

All hell breaks loose then.

Streams of grey energy shoot away from the brims of the mask and from its eye holes. Luca's screaming just as something else inside of the mask begins to scream. An uproar of sudden gust pushes away from Luca, causing the trees to sway back and forth and dirt to swirl around the scene. Waves roll away from the scene over the lake. The lantern is knocked over, and pushed into a tree, causing that light source to vanish.

Aristotle's Cosmos appears around Luca. A kind of wall rises up from the circle's outline, but it breaks like glass. Luca's clothes begin ripping at the seams, torn apart from the power erupting from within his body.

I get up and try to tackle Luca. He sees me, and laughs. He raises his right hand... and degausses a gigantic, grey beam from the palm of his hand. It stars off small, but morphs into a shot taller than all of the trees and it rips through them like they're twigs.

I'm not directly hit, but I am pushed away from the blasts. Slowly, I feel my power to degauss come back. I try to summon my own giant energy blast, but nothing comes out but tiny electric-gold sparks. Luca laughs, and raises his left hand this time.

I'm pushed away in the blast. I was caught at the side of it, due to jumping left at the opportune time. Unfortunately, only catching some of it still hurt me, and I was pushed into a tree nearby. I begin to lose consciousness.

I see grey degaussed energy rise up around Luca, and I hear a cackling. The universe crumbles around him, and the forest fades away. The tree I was laying against turned into a brick wall; above me, the numbers 417, 444, and 777 could be seen.

It was the morning and I was shivering, and wet from my own blood.

I lost.

Friday, November 18, 2011


The 757 have thrown me out of my own group. My friends are no longer my friends.

Luca did it. Yesterday, he called a meeting for everyone in The 757 except me.

He basically convinced them that I'm not cut out to be the leader of The 757, and that I caused everything. Which is true, yes, but...

There are no buts. What am I even talking about. This is good.

This is what I deserve.

I need to be alone. Away from everyone.

Degausser has faded away, and Sowing Season is completely broken.

I'm back to being me. A loser kid without a clue.

And that's what I deserve. I deserve, what I deserve.

I'm sorry everyone. I'll make this all right. I'll fix this all.

I'll get rid of Grey, for good. And me too. I'll fix the problem here.

Steven's phone number changed. I keep calling and calling, but someone else answers.

Tonight I bury my sins.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Not the Sun

Churchland Middle School was completely empty, despite it being a weekday. Usually, there would be some teacher or janitor or school official left behind, working on something after school. Not today. Our echoes were unanswered after breaking in.

We basically knocked the front door down, into the school. We weren't holding anything back, we were heading in at full powered Degausser. Everyone was completely ready to erase Grey.

The school was dull and gray inside, even more so than how it looked outside, where it was raining. The air felt heavier, and a melancholy permeated throughout the building. It's hard to explain, but easy to understand; Churchland Middle was now Grey's territory, like most of Porstmouth would be in a few days time.

Portsmouth was already changing. There were forests where there wasn't any space for forests. The skies were always overcast. Random fog showed up out of nowhere frequently. Shadows were longer, days felt shorter and nights were almost unbearably neverending. One could say that this was just Winter weather, but we know better. We can see it, and feel it. It's almost like a smell. A rotting.

This town is done for if we don't do something.

The worst part is, though, that this "we" who can see it? It only includes The 757 and those who are aware of Grey and The Devil. Everyone else is in ignorance. It's almost as if Grey is not allowing them to see what's so obvious now. Maybe he's influencing them already to feel this way.

Some appear to -almost- deduce what Grey is doing, but they just can't seem to put it together.

We walked into the familiar main area of the school. Lockers on one side, continuous glass wall...or window thing(?) to the other side, showing the interior courtyard.

Grey was nowhere to be seen. He was everywhere, though. You could feel his presence.

Where was his main body?

"Come on out, you coward." I screamed out, with my hoarse voice. My voice is pretty much broken from the past few days of screaming. It hurts to talk.

 And then Grey appeared,  a few feet away from us all, in a different form than last time. It was like looking into a mirror; he took my body and mirrored it, creating his own. Around his body, he wore a ripped, torn robe. I could hear the tiny threads underneath the robe, writhing and contorting. Under their contortions, I could hear screaming.

We stared at each other. No one moved for almost thirty seconds, but we then decided to initiate the battle with the first blow. With one swift emotion, almost like a dance, we raised a giant wave of the Degaussing energy, and aimed to crush Grey with it.

At the same time we were preparing the wave....Grey smirks and raises his right hand to the side. The giant wave of energy attempts to crush Grey, but with hand, Grey summons a burst of brilliant gold energy, and it collides with the wave. The collision creates a giant blast, forcing us back a few steps.

How did he summon that golden energy? The one from my dream? He shouldn't be able to do that.

The energy from the blast dissipates, clearing out of the room. Grey has disappeared yet again. The 757 stay close together, in a circle, ready to

Grey was in the center of the circle, somehow. He was so quick. He laughs, and the strings from underneath his robe stretch out, attempting to stab us. Markus is cut on his arm, but does not cry out. Mason, amazingly adept at Degaussing individually, shoots off an rounded energy burst at Grey's face.

Grey moves to the side, kicks Mason in the gut, then sweeps his legs out from under him. Grey feints a punching motion into Mason, but turns around instead and knocks Patrick down. Grey tries jumping atop of Patrick, but Markus tackles him. Markus barely steps back before Grey's tendrils stab outward from under his cloak. Markus summons a giant square block of energy, and tries slamming it down on Grey, but Grey rolls out of the way and jumps to his feet.

We all stand there, still for a second, panting.

Grey moves again, at a speed no human could ever hope to achieve, directly at us.

We move closer together again, and summon a wave like we did in the Church parking lot. It crashes over Grey, and for a second, we think we injured him.

A moment later, and a golden light glows from underneath the residual energy from the wave. It splashes up, and becomes its own wave, heading for us.

Unlike Grey, if we're hit by Degausser, we have the potential to be severely injured. So we had to think fast to move out of the way; what could we do?

Perhaps it was a good thing Mason hitched along instead of Andrew. Mason is possibly better than Luca and I at Degaussing. See, Mason walked to the front of us, set his palms to the ground....and lifted us all up off of the ground, with a flying carpet of Degaussing energy.

Mason chuckles as we float above Grey. Grey stands below us with an open jaw, amazed.

"We're going to kick your ass, you fucking joke for a ghost," Mason says.

"And once you're down? You're staying down." Markus adds.

"It's been a long time coming, but your time is up! This is for K!" Patrick says along with them.

"Don't even think you can escape your own ultimate fate: death...." Steven says in a nervous voice.

 Keil doesn't say anything but plants his right fist into his left hand, and grins.

I don't say anything either. I didn't have to. They said it all for me.

We jump down from the floating carpet and, all at once, barrage Grey with Degaussing energy shots. He shouts out in pain; that bastard was in delicious, vengeful pain. Blood...some type of substance anyways...spills all over the school floor.

We are all surprised we landed those hits. We stand their, bewildered.

Grey is looking down at the floor, breathing heavily. Blood pours out from his chest as he holds to it with his arms, almost looking as if he's trying to hold his chest together.

But then little puffs of smoke leaked from under his hands. The blood stopped spurting out as fast as it was; it eventually stopped altogether.

Grey was healing himself.

We weren't going to just let him sit there and heal himself. We ran at him, ready to finish it all.

Grey stands there, and looks up. He's grinning. His face is in pain, but he's still smiling.

He mouths the words "Got you....", and then runs to meet us directly.

One second, we were in Churchland Middle School.

The next, we were sent flying over the ballroom of the universe. As in, we weren't in Portsmouth anymore, nor on Earth. We were outside the edge of everything.

Everything to nothing.

Degausser still linked us together, somehow. I tried using Sowing Season to dull everyone's fear, but it was no use; they were terrified. I think that if I hadn't of tried shielding them at all, they would have died with the fright...or perhaps their mind would have shattered.

And then, we were back in the Middle School. Degausser broke, because we weren't in one place, together; Grey had split us up. 

I heard Grey chuckle.

"Now that you're all alone...will all of you be able to deal with the promise of Death?"

Grey's physical body wasn't anywhere near me. He was speaking over the school's PA system. He was dividing and conquering yet again.

I panicked. Alone, I knew that I could at least hold off Grey for a while, but my friends....

I was on the third floor; the floor with 2 long hallways with actual windows(unlike the second floor; the school was created originally to function as a bomb shelter as well, so there aren't many windows. Almost like a jail). I ran down the hallway to the nearest set of stairs and descended it.

I decided to go through the second floor first to look for them. When I entered the main hallway of the second floor, at first, I saw no one. A second later though, Patrick ran out from one of the bathrooms. Behind him was Grey....except not.

Grey was in a different form than his human form. He was in the shape that resembled the character No-Face from the movie Spirited Away. The long robe, which did not have arms, that led led to a white Noh mask.

No laughter. This form of Grey was completely silent.

It almost seemed like he was emotionless as well. And without feeling.

But, inside of myself...I could feel some sort of wild hunger inside of him.

He wanted to devour all.

This form of Grey moved almost like a snake. As if the mask was floating by itself. The robe trailed along behind the mask as it pursued Patrick.

 "Patrick! Over here!!" I shouted at him. He saw me, and he followed me into the staircase.

The staircase was situated in its own ascending room, closed off with a door. Above us from the third floor, we heard Markus and Keil running down the stairs.

"Guys, come with us!!"

"Wait, Owen, where's Mason?!"

"We'll find him, just come on-"

Grey burst in right behind me at that moment. He slid up my back, and coiled around my waist....the robe had something solid inside of it. Yet, what I saw in Grey's mask: nothing.

The stench of death drifted off around me. Grey spoke, in a voice without emotion.

 "Children...stop running. Don't you see this is all meaningless? You are all going to die...why not now? I can tell you your futures: disappointment, heartbreak, destruction. Your days are all numbered. I am performing a great service by taking you out of the Game now. Don't you see that if you don't follow the Shepard when he commands it, you'll get lost, stranded from his herd? Please, stop while you are ahead...."

None of us even considered giving up. Maybe if he hadn't of taken Katelyn away from us. She deserved nothing like this. She was a shoe-in to Heaven. But now...she's destined to live inside of Death for all time.

No. Fuck Grey. This wasn't happening.

And yet, we were powerless.

Grey says nothing for a few minutes. We stand there, unsure of what was to happen next.

It almost seemed like Grey was waiting.

Finally, Grey says, "Well, it seems to be that he's not coming. A shame." His voice was transforming back into the old tone.

A hand, extending from under the robe, twists around my throat.

"You all make shitty bait, you know that? This means that you are all meaningless, and I have no extended need for you all."

It grips...

"I guess, Owen, that I'm going to have to take you this time. It's a shame....I changed my mind about you...despite you being my ideal body, he would have been easier to use...his's alright though. You and I are in love, after all...admit it, Owen. You love the pain I put you be my babe is a delightful experience, is it not? My bitch."

The stench of death grows stronger.

"Time for me to finish th-"

Grey stops talking as some sort of liquid drips down from his mask to my shoulder.

"Ughh....what..he DID come? Why didn't I sense him...?"

Behind us, stood our old friend Luca. Streams of Degausser energy leaked from his fingers.

Luca could Degausser alone now...but how?

He fires another shot, and bits of Grey's mask are blown up into the air. Grey is knocked off of my body by the impact, and lands to the ground; he writhes around in pain.

 "Take bastard..."
Luca moans. Tears drip down from his eyes.  
"Do you feel that? That's pain. Katelyn, fortunately, felt little of it. But, by God as my witness, I am going to make sure you feel Hell."

Grey stops moving around. He looks up, and deep within his mask, a light shines.

His robe tears, and another mask pops up from inside of it. Two heads now, instead of one.

It was The Devil. No wonder we had not seen that guy. I was worried about him. The two had merged together...but not completely. Something didn't feel right, what with them being held together like that.

I don't recall why, but I remember imagining a bridge when looking at them. As if that's what they needed.

They were just two islands...they needed a bridge.

Perhaps that's why they needed a human, huh?

While the rest of us gasped when The Devil appeared randomly like that, Luca just shook his head in annoyance. He raised his hand, and a sharp ray of Degausser fired off and stabbed directly in between Grey and The Devil; it ripped The Devil's neck almost in half.

The two heads moaned in pain, and were crawling away from Luca.

"Please don't...please don't...." Grey begged.

Luca laughs.

"Yeah. Because begging is going to work..."

Grey begins crying.

"Don't you  see...this isn't my fault!? I'm just doing what I'm designed to do....Owen's the one at blame. This bastard caused everything! If he had left that pocketwatch alone, then little Kay would be alive, now wouldn't she...?"

Luca's face looks concerned with something as Grey says that, but he does not reply.

Instead, he raises his hand to finish the job.

I hear a faint chuckle from Grey....alarm bells went off in my head, and I tried warning Luca.

"Luca, be careful, I think he's up to-"

Grey jumps up from the ground and tries to bite Luca's head off. Luca shouts in surprise, shooting off the Degausser prematurely.

Instead of being a focused beam, the Degausser exploded outwards in a large blast, ripping upwards against the stairwell, sending Grey and The Devil into the air; they landed at the top of the stairwell. The blast pushed me down the stairs, sending me face first into a couple of steps. I wasn't too hurt afterwards, but it did cause a fair amount of pain.

Luca dusted himself and his hoodie off, and began ascending the steps. I decided to make sure The 757 weren't hurt before heading off after him. After we were sure no one had broken any bones or anything, and after activating Degausser, we ran up after Grey and Luca.

Luca was on the ground, on his knees. Crying. Before him, Grey had changed.

The cloak had opened up, and inside, there was Katy's dead body. The tendrils inside of the cloak wrapped around her neck and head, keeping them together. Bits of an apple were crushed inside of her mouth.

Luca was completely useless now. He could never attack what with her sister's dead body being a few feet away from him and his mental state at the time.

It was up to us now, again.

Grey noticed us, and giggles. He focuses on me....and then starts to separate from the main body. It's hard to's like he just cut completely away from The Devil. Somehow, the robe did not tear or anything. It's almost indescribable.

I was ready to roll with the punches and fight with Grey, but he...

Grey changed into Anna.

Basically, the robe split down the middle, fell off along with the mask, and there was Anna.
Just standing there.

I...I don't want to keep going with this story. I want to stop typing. It hurts to think about her.

But like back then, Steven is yelling at me now to finish this story.

Steven yelled out, and told me to snap out of my daze. That he understood my pain, but I had to work through it. That I couldn't let Grey beat me a cliche trick.

He was right. I couldn't keep going like that. This had to end here.

So I closed my eyes, and  along with the others, summoned a Degausser blast; it sent my lover's body into the stairwell door, blasting through it, and pushed it onto the hallway floor. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I stumbled past the remains of the door. Finish it.

"I'll take care of Grey. You all focus on The Devil."

Mason laughs out loud, and says;
"No, that's a shitty idea, Owen. We're fighting it together."

Patrick adds onto that, and says;
"Definitely. You're not in this alone, son."

"Keep your mouth shut and let us help, dude."

"You're not alone, man. We want revenge too..."

"We're staying in formation, asshole. Got it?"

"....Very well then." I couldn't think of anything else to say.

I approached Grey. Anna's body was torn and bleeding everywhere, but I did not look away. Not this time. I had to face her. Had to keep my eyes on her.

Without knowing what I was doing, I raised my hand; Degausser energy started  to circulate around my hand and focus on the center of my palm. It did this unconsciously, I was not commanding it this time.

The circle was closing.

The Devil made some strange noise. It moved past Luca, and started to scream unintelligibly at us. Mason, with a grin on his face, shot into the Devil's jaw, effectively shutting him up.

"Do we seal Grey, then seal The Devil? Or..." Markus asks.

"We are going to seal them at the same time."

"How is that possible?"

"Are you seriously asking that? Now? After everything we've been through? I don't know how it is, I just know it is. Just like you know that we're not destroying Grey...we're sealing him away, for good. Something's guiding us...our bodies are no longer ours."

A shiver ran down my spine as I said that. The thought was scary, but it was for the best. It comforted me a little as I thought about it more. We weren't alone.

"Patrick, Markus, and Keil; you three stay with The Devil. Mason and Steven, stay behind me, at that spot."

With everyone in an ideal formation, I walked a bit closer to Grey, who sat on the porcelain floor....bleeding out everywhere. Anna's body was slowly decaying away rapidly, and under the skin, was the familiar black robe Grey always wore. Her face was ripping down the middle, revealing Grey's mask.

The energy around my hand started to intensify. So much scared me. If I made a wrong move, I could have accidentally blown my hand off.  

I wanted a clear shot at that damn mask. That mask was the hub of most of Grey's energy at the moment. I needed to completely disintegrate it. I stood over my lover's body, aiming carefully at her face.

It was all so sudden. I fired off the shot, probably the strongest concentrated one I've ever created, but Grey quickly deflected it. Anna's body had ripped open down the middle and front part of the neck, and Grey, like a bullet, shot out of the body and grabbed onto me.

His mask fell off, and under it was the form he had been using. He was spooky to be so close to a mirror image of my face.

"Be my serene...."

My energy felt as if it was being subdued. He was trying to break back into my body.

The world around me started to melt away. Everything slid outside of my vision.
I was floating away with Grey.

But before I was completely gone....a blast seemingly out of nowhere, a degausser blast, hit Grey and I. We spun around in the air, and hit the ground together. I was in pain, but that was mostly from the impact of the floor. Grey had absorbed the most of the impact.

The blast had been tiny, and had little power. I did not need to look to know that Andrew had come to help. I looked at him...and if I could have smiled, I would have.

Using the window of time that Andrew had bought me, I decided that, instead of floating with Grey...I wanted to sink with Grey. I wanted to turn the tables on him. I wanted the advantage.

So, using all the energy I had, I powered my body up with Degausser, coating myself with it like a skin,  and rushed at Grey, screaming at the top of my lungs. Grey looked so surprised. I tackled him, pressing my right arm into his neck. I pushed into him with all my might, and transported us both away.


I found myself on a grassy hill, with an oak tree at the top of it. The hill did not have any surroundings. Where the hill ended...there was nothing. Just blank space. It was almost as if I was in a Winnie the Pooh storybook, only without another page on an adjacent page.

Grey was at the top of the hill. He did not say a word.

Neither did I.

We both ran at each other, me up the hill and him down the hill. We met each other, and began to fist fight.

No Degausser this time. I was fighting on my own terms.

He was quick. My fists barely made contact. That was okay though. I was pretty quick too.

Finally, when we were close enough to the tree, I saw an opening, blocked one of his fists, and pushed him into the tree.


While I was fighting Grey, it seems that The Devil ran off.

The 757 wanted to chase after him, but they could not. While I was -away-, strange markings appeared on the hallway floor.

It was "Aristotles Cosmos." The stone tablet markings we had seen in the forest.

The thing that had assigned us numbers.

The 757 were forced, by that unnatural force that has been working through us this entire time, to stand on the markings. They then somehow knew that they had to focus on using their Degausser to "defeat the low."

That's the phrase that had appeared in their head when they described it to me later.

Luca did not participate. He sat there on the floor, and did not speak a word. He didn't even pay attention to the 757. The poor kid was broken.


Grey was finally in place. The circle began to close. The Ritual began.

 I felt foreign energy circulate inside of my body. The 757 were lending me their power.

Little stars of white energy appeared above me.
They sparked and popped, like fireworks.

Despite the lightshow, the sky darkened, as if a storm was coming.

The hill shook, as if an earthquake was occurring.

Words tumbled around in my throat, and I was forced to say them. As I said them, the rate of the exploding of the lights above increased.

I don't know why I said these words. Really, I don't know what they meant either. I wasn't the person talking. It was the force that had been manipulating us this entire time that had been talking.

"Tell me you know what I mean...."

I let go of Grey's arm, and in a fit of passionate rage, I grabbed onto his robe.

"You've set on me, but you are not the Sun!! And you will not listen!!"


Grey grabs onto my shirt at the same time, and pushed me off, and then forces me into the tree.

"How do you know what I am?"

I push him off of me, and kick him directly in the chest. I grab his robe again, and throw him into the tree.

"Burn it down," a voice in my head says. The lights above throw themselves down into the hill, and everything begins to burn into nothing.

"You've set on me and you are NOT THE SUN! You are not the sun!!!" I scream into Grey's face.

The degaussed fire started to consume us in its explosive rage. I felt it burn at my soul, and for a moment, I faced Death along with Grey.I bit down on my lip and tongue to prevent myself from screaming, like Grey was. The tiny universe we were in started to burn away, just like a page in a book as a fire leaks licks at it.

And then we were pushed out of it. A hole appeared, and we fell through it. I was tackling Grey down to the ground... it was almost as if we had never left Churchland. My soul had not been destroyed...and neither had Grey's. What the fuck? I felt tricked! I was ready to die and everything!

Nevertheless, I picked myself up. My insides burned... I guess the soul is located within the body somewhere? I don't know. 

Grey was on the floor, motionless. I grabbed onto his robe and tried picking him up. I couldn't salvage the strength to do that. The 757 ran over and helped me pick him up. No one talked. The only audible sound other than our shuffling shoes was Luca's sobbing.

I asked them what had happened to The Devil. He had appeared again in the hallway to attack the rest of the 757 while they were sealing Grey, hadn't he? They told me that he had just... popped out of existence. That worried me a bit, until I realized that I had probably dragged him along with Grey into the other world. If that was the case, then he was probably sealed away as well. If not, well, we'll deal with him later.

Andrew stayed with Luca. We didn't want to make Luca go anywhere.

We headed down the stairs.

I don't know why we were bringing him down stairs. I just know that we brought him to the main hall, and then exited to the courtyard. Once there, we laid him down at the center of it.

We surrounded him in a circle. Aristotle's Cosmos appeared again, under Grey. It was glowing.

We all, for a moment, just stared at Grey's corpse. It was a tranquil moment, hidden inside all of the chaos that had surrounded this final kill. He was finally dead. After all-

Grey suddenly bursts back to life and launches himself at me. There wasn't any time to waste on thought. We had to act fast and seal him away forever. He tries to tackle me out of formation, but I punch him in the gut.

"Stay down." I grunt. He falls back into the circle and we begin the ritual.

Light pushed up from the ground inside the circle. Grey was screaming and crying. The light hurt him. The light began to consume him. It was as if the light was alive.

His body... the mirror image of my body, was breaking down in contact with the light. Cracks  appeared across the skin, and the skin was blackening. It started falling apart. Disintegrating.

Grey looked at Luca, and then at me. His eyes stared straight into mine. They... they seemed pleased. He even grinned as his teeth were disintegrating and his neck slowly rotted out. His head plopped to the ground, and he died with a smile on his face.

The circle closed.

In the ashes, was the porcelain mask. That damn mask. As the light vanished and the circle faded away, I walked over and picked up the mask. As soon as I touched it, I knew what I had to do: I had to bury it. Far, far away. There was no current safe way to destroy it.

And that was that. We were done.

We made our way out towards the exit of the school after retrieving Luca and Andrew. Luca was composed enough to walk on his own by then. Before we could depart, we ran into Luca's grandfather and a few of his henchmen. They seemed ready for battle and everything.

Our group and their group just stared at each other, wordlessly, for a few moments.

I break the silence. "He's gone, Norman."


He rubs his forehead and pulls out a cigarette.

He's silent for half a minute. He crushes out his cigarette, and speaks.

"Luca, over here. Now." 

Luca doesn't respond. He keeps staring at the floor.

"...What did I just tell you? Get over here. Now."

Luca begins to approach his grandfather... and then walks past him. He walks out of the building.

Norman's shocked.

We follow Luca out. Norman doesn't stop us.

Steven and I are at my house. I'm typing this.

I'm going to sleep early tonight.  I don't know what's next. Don't ask.

I hope Luca can pick himself back together.


It is done. Steven completed the circle by finally being marked with a number, in conjunction with Mason being branded with his number.

We are a perfect, enclosed loop now.

Grey cannot hurt us.

Grey will not hurt us.

We are going to throw Grey out of Portsmouth.

And maybe even possibly erase him from existence for good. 


Wednesday, November 16, 2011


First things first, we need to get ready for the attack tomorrow.

Full on offensive. No regrets.

We need all of The 757.

However... Luca cannot attend.

This is why we have replaced him.

Mason came back to us.

Or forced to. I'm not sure anymore.

How much of this is us?

Clearly, we've been handed this power.

Something wants us to finish Grey.

Is it....

No, of course not.

And Andrew might be breaking.

Hopefully he can hold it together until tomorrow.

We only have one shot, and I'm not going to waste it.

So tomorrow, we venture to Churchland Middle School.

That is going to be our battleground.

There's just one more thing we need to take care of first.

Welcome to Bangkok

Space cadet, pull out.
My feet shuffle slowly over a wooden, dusty floor. I am making my way down a dark corridor. The walls seem to be smudged with grime, and also have a thick layer of dust covering them. On the floor, there are various bits of rubbish; from tiny rat bones, to soda cans, to all sorts of disgusting, unhealthy things.
I feel so tired and dizzy; lightheaded. My feet feel so heavy, my chest feels so light. I, on some level, know exactly where I am going, but on another level, the conscious one, I have no clue what my destination is. My body is shaking, and sweat crawls down my neck and arms. I am hot, I am cold.
On the end of my hands, I am wearing boxing gloves. I am wearing shorts with a pattern I cannot recall (black, grey, and white, I believe?). I have no shirt on. My glasses are gone, yet my eyesight is perfect.
 Space cadet, pull out. 
I was back inside of the house. The house. The house I grew up in. The house where a part of me died. The house where this all began. If I hadn't of been pissed off at my mother that day, I would have never gone on that walk to the creek. The reason I had gone in the first place...I wasn't going on just an everyday walk. I wanted to throw away all of the novels that she was reading. It's a bit of a long story, but she had been reading them constantly and taking away ideas from them and adding them into her own bullshit. 
I took the novels, those crazy fucking novels that talk about how ANYTHING could happen when you just believed in yourself really fucking hard; that you could do anything. I took those novels to the creek, and threw them into it. I ran past that car that held the watch, not even bothering to look into it at first. 
I should have burned those books instead.
I was back inside of the house. It was so cold. Outside, there was the occasional tap on one of the windows from a steady drizzle of rain. The house was so barren and empty. 
And then I heard someone upstairs, walking around in my brothers' room. 
Space cadet, ...pull out.
I am typing away at a computer. Words flood into my brain, jumbling together somehow and creating coherent sentences, yet incoherent paragraphs. Blood trickles down from my mouth; I feel as if my body is decomposing rapidly inside. The decay is rotting my innards away. 
My heart is blackening, and my lungs are filling with a grey liquid. He feels so cozy while clogging up my veins. He chuckles, I choke up. My throat gurgles with a mixture of the alien substances, and my own blood; the blood that is drying away minute by minute. I can feel my bones turn to dust.
Yet I am still living, still typing, still thinking, still learning, still hurting.
What was that noise? Did someone break into the house? Who was that trip-trapping across my bridge? Who even had the nerves to trespass like this? This house is so sad. Who would want to steal anything that had been permeated with such melancholy while being locked up in this house? I know I wouldn't. 
I put a foot on the first step to the stairwell. I looked up. All the pictures that had adorned the wall were gone now. All that was left was the white wall. I felt so stuck with the two walls that ran up along the stairs. They were parallel structures leading up to the higher level.
Of my house.
Would I find God when I ventured up these steps? 
 I make my way down the corridor. At the end, a tiny sliver of light shines out in the distance. As I get closer, the sliver of light widens. A uproar of sound pushes outwards from the opening. I approach the opening, and am amazed to see everyone I've ever cared for squished into a room, that was, in comparison to most portrayals of rooms where boxing matches are held, quite small.
They were all shouting varying remarks. Insults. Praise. General bullshit. Whatever they would say to me now, whatever they were going to say to me, and whatever they had said to me in the past. I didn't spend too much time searching through the crowds' faces, but I do not recall seeing any of The 757.
There was the boxing ring. I climbed onto it, ready for the Death Match.
The steps creaked as I slowly climbed up them. The railing in the wall moved and wobbled a bit like how we had left it, but it was still attached to the wall. I looked up above me, and noticed a grand spider web. A fly flew into the spider web, and was now stuck in it. The web wiggled.
I felt like an insect. Who is that trip-trapping across my web?
My eyes bled and my skin felt like it was sliding off. My teeth cracked and broke and crumbled until they were dust, and then I swallowed the dust. The dust traveled down the throat, but did not travel any further. And then my other bones seemed to follow suit. Blood is trickling onto the keyboard. Was.
What am I going to do? Do I do anything? Can I do anything? 
Do I want to do anything?
No, I would not find God. Not in this Hell. This isn't some place where I was going to find a true version of myself either. No. I'm going to find the beast, the monster behind all this. Or maybe a new monster. Or perhaps The Devil itself. Anything but The Holy Trinity.
I was on the landing. I was landing. My shoes contacted the wooden floor. I felt rotting wood give in a bit. This house was falling down. My mother never let anyone fix it. She just let the termites eat away at everything. The house was falling down, just like I was.
I looked to the left, just in time to see The Monster.
"Who's that trip-trapping across my bridge?" said Grey. He was up there, in the same exact outfit as me; he was wearing a man-suit, that is. He was my mirror image, except for a few differences. His eyes leaked shadow. His skin was pale; almost grey, like his hair. He smiled, something that I never did/do/will do.
 He laughed. He laughed at me. He laughed at my pain; the writhing pain. He walked towards me; the anger mixed in with the pain forced me to walk towards him too.
We were facing each other, in the center of the platform. 
"Think fast...." he whispers into my ear.
Before I figure out what he's about to do, a bell rings out and the match begins.
Inside the doorway to the right, into my brothers' room, is The Devil. His mask...I don't remember, or any other details about him, for that matter. I only remember two things; his wild, blue eyes, and for some reason, seeing the image of a dragon inside of his shadow. 
The Devil cackles in a deep voice that doesn't sound like cackling at all to a human. 
It roars. The sound shakes the entire house all the way to its rotting foundation.
It speaks, but I cannot hear it. 
And then it jumps on top of me, and starts its screaming. Its darkness wraps around me, encircling me in a twister of pure undiluted aggression. It feels so tight as it rapidly squeezes on me. 
I was eye to eye with the Monster itself. 
I touched my face...what face? I licked the inside of my mouth...the dull, metallic taste met my tongue. My face was slowly falling apart; it was melting like wax; it was cracking like a mirror; it was crumbling away like ash. It itched. It hurt. My eyes felt loose in their sockets. My hair began falling out.
I heard my heart beating.
 The Monster was enveloping me into its land. I felt its heart beating along with mine.
Grey landed a punch in the center of my chest. I was pushed up into the air by the blow. He then punched me again, sending me spiraling to the edge of the ring. 
And then he began to scream. The same high pitched scream I heard the night Katelyn was murdered.
I got up, and attempted to run over to him and land a blow, but he stepped to the side, closed one eye, and punched me in the jaw. 
"Well, Champ, looks like your title is going to be taken away, eh? Shame. I was hoping for a challenge this time. You disappoint me, Owen. Come on, I know you better than this!! Are you really a broken toy now? DO I HAVE TO DISPOSE OF YOU? Please say no, Owen...."
I look up to his face,... and spit blood into it.
He laughs in that high pitched squeal, and waits for me to stand up.
My legs are shaking as I struggle to pick myself back up; when I am directly facing him, he looks at me...and shakes his head, as if he's annoyed.
 "Just give up, Owen. Stop trying so hard to hold on to yourself. Sometimes it's just best to forget and let go, you know? Blur out everything else. Let me in. I promise you eternal bliss; I'll keep your personality. You'll live inside of me for all eternity. 
You'll be me. And isn't that the greatest reward of all?"
I ignore him as blood drips down my chin.
"...You perplex me, Owen. Very well then. Everything, to nothing. That is your punishment."
He looks up and laughs again. 
"Humans perplex me in general. Do you not realize...the thing you search for in your scripture...has been with you this entire time? You've been looking into the clouds, when you should have been looking into your mirrors. But I'll correct you guys. I'll show you all who's everything...and nothing."
 The Monster does not let go.
It's funny. I was nothing when I left that house, and I was nothing when I entered it again.
But at that moment, with that Monster. I was Something.
No, not something. Something. Everything.
I had become Something Else.
Unimaginable power flooded through me. A River...The River.
Inside of me. It poured energy into me. Like blood.
I could have let go...let The River pull me into its current...
I realize the computer screen I am looking into is a mirror. I am not falling apart. I can pull myself back together. All I have to do is get back up. I cannot give in. Not when others' lives are on the line.
And then Daisy's light obliterated the Darkness inside of the Forest.
I do not need unlimited power. I do not need to give into Sin.
I do not need to give up yet.
I do not want to give up yet.
The story's almost over. All I have to do is turn the page.
The Slender Man appears in the bedroom, and its tentacles pull the Monster away from me.
My ass hits the floor again. Grey is screaming and hitting me and destroying me. 
But I feel a warmth inside of me. 
A flame burning out the center.
I get up, and Degausser flows inside of my veins.
I've always been stubborn. I am, after all, my mother's son. How could I ever forget that?
The gloves are blown off of my fists as a golden energy leaks out of them.
Of course, it's understandable I'd falter in such misfortune. 
The stupid grin on Grey's face disappears, but he does not quit screaming.
Anyone would. But it doesn't mean it's okay to stay down. 
He attempts to land another punch, but I close one eye and step to the side.
I have to pick myself up, even if I'm in pieces. One by one, if I have to.
I grab his arm. He does not stop his screams of aggression. 
I am not energized by some newfound confidence. 
He shakes away my grip and tries landing another hit; his arm glows a silver hued color.
This is me doing what has to be done. For my family, for my friends. For my town.
Our fists fly past each other.
Because I have to protect the ones I love.
Because as fucked as this place got, it made me "me."
Because I can carry this weight.
I scream. Tears pour down my face as a mix of emotions cloud my mind.
We hit each other at the same time. 
Everything to Nothing.

For half an hour today, Sowing Season failed. This was the result of that. 

But maybe it was for the better.

I do not want to die yet.

I'm not giving in.

I want revenge.

I don't want to let go.

I want to kill Grey.

I don't want to live.

I just want to see you die, you bastard.

I do not have much time. Once Sowing Season fails completely, Grey will take my body over.

But I do have a plan.

We are going to perfect Degausser. 

We are going to use this weapon the town has handed us to kill the Dragon in the countryside.

Sowing Season is the armor, Degausser is the shield, and Daisy is the sword.

I am a Knight. Silly sounding, but it's true.

Holy Spirit

I used to read the Bible every night, until I realized that I was putting faith into someone else.

Don't I need to put faith into myself?

Yeah. That would be the lesson I'd be talking about learning if that was truly the problem.

But it isn't. That's not even close.

Life isn't going to get any better, even if I believe in myself.

Even if I try my hardest.

Even if everything goes right.

Because I'm never going to get anything right.

That's not who I am, that's not who I was before this, and that's not who I'm ever going to be.

I'm a Failure By Design.

That's what I am, that's what I have been, and that's what I'll always be.

I'm in shambles, and if I was a normal person, I'd be able to put myself back together again.

But I'm not. I was a wreck before this whole Dying Man thing.

"Local man ruins everything."

That should be the headline for the newspapers soon.

We're running out of time. This town's finished.

Grey's won.

Why bother fighting him?

I'd pray, but it wouldn't work.

I'd stand for something, but I'll only end up falling.

I'd try being some great white hope, but I'll never shake this little feeling.

I need to throw out everyone.

I need to burn out everything.

It's hard to be a good man sometimes...isn't it?


I'm praying, and no one's answering.

Just like every other time I prayed.

I'd pray to Jesus, sure; all the fucking time.

I'd plead to him, begging for him to make my mother "normal".

At the time, I thought she just had anger issues.

But no. It was much worse than that.

I hate my mother with all my heart, and I hope she burns in Hell.

I'd pray, but nothing ever got better.

Not even the little things.

"Jesus, please let someone notice how fucking sad I am."

"Jesus, please let tomorrow be better."

"Jesus, please let me know if I'm a normal kid or not."

There was nothing. Nothing ever came to my aid.

I'd just sit around and cry all the time.

But crying didn't do anything, did it?

It'd just increase the pain I was in.

The pain I go through...could it ever compare to the pain others go through?

Does it matter? I'm nothing.

Why do I care if anything related to me even matters?

Don't I already know the answer?

No. I don't matter.

I'm not some important piece to the puzzle that is life.

I'm not some important person that my school couldn't live without.

I'm not some important boy some important girl could somehow love.

I'm not some important son that a mother loves out there.

I'm not anyone to anything.

If I disappeared,

If I just floated into the sky,

If I burned every bridge,

If I just closed one eye and stepped to the side,

If I.


That's all it ever is with me, isn't it?


If things would get better, I swear, I'd try to get better as well.

But I'm in shambles. And the saddest thing is,

I'm not any different from when I started out.

I haven't learned a thing.

And I'm still pointing the finger at who's to blame.

When I should be pointing it into the mirror.

This is all my fault.

This is all my fault.

I used to read the Bible every night.


I'm back from jail.

Back to my own sad little world. hometown.

This place. Why this place.

Maybe I should just let Grey have this town.

Let it burn to the ground.

Wouldn't that be justice?

This place is a horrible town to live in.

Or city. Whatever.

I can't tell if this place is too small or too big sometimes.

This place is three things at once, isn't it?

Suburban. Urban. Rural.

Yep. Sounds about right.

My (step)grandfather is the oldest servicing police officer in the entire force.

He's retiring in April.

How could he stand those nights watching over this pathetic, crime infested place?

Maybe this place is the perfect comparison to Grey.

In between everything.

Oldetown. The oldest part of this city.

Basically a shitload of colonial-style buildings.

They've been there forever.

When will they fall down?

Nothing stands forever.

Everything falls apart eventually.

I used to pray every night.

I'm praying.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Owen's in jail, guys. We're trying to get him out ASAP. Sorry for not giving much info; we honestly don't know what happened. All we know is that Owen was spotted near Luca's father's dead body.

Luca won't respond to any of our attempts to contact him.


Monday, November 14, 2011

You Won't Know

My ability to recall upon memories has been shattered. Time is no longer relative. Space seems to be enclosing upon me. My mind is in shambles, and I doubt all the king's horses and all the king's men will be able to fix me up ever again. Not that they ever have. No, I've always been broken, haven't I? I just needed that push from Grey. Straight into the abyss.

I can't remember what that goddamn Church looked like. The Church they held something in. I have no clue. All I can remember is the light falling in from the decorative windows, the emptying pews, and the broken man who sat near the front of the chapel. He was dressed for the occasion; a funeral. The funeral of his daughter, actually. Luca's father sat before me, broken and confused.

His face was devoid of emotion. He just stared into space. Without emotion, without the smile I had seen worn on him in the pictures throughout Luca's house, he looked pitiful. His eyes kept staring on and on, unaware that the service had finished.

He knew about Grey. He knew what had killed his daughter.

I sat down beside him, silent. Time skips on, skips back. I don't remember what I said at first. It didn't matter what I said though. We shared the same pain. We wanted payback, didn't we? We wanted to destroy the Dragon who had destroyed our Princess. And the Demon too. That's what we were dealing with now, huh? Two things, trying to take over this city. 

I don't recall what was said either. I do wish I could. One second, I was sitting next to him in the church pews. The next, we were exiting the church and heading to his house. He drove. As he drove through Portsmouth, we noticed something strange; the trees seemed...more foreboding. They seemed to be growing, in a way. And everything was in shadow, despite it being a sunny day. It almost seemed like we were in a forest.

In Suffolk. The family were out and about, at some afterparty thing we should have gone to. But we weren't going to show up. No, we had different plans. In his house. He showed me to his closet in his room. In the closet, there was a locker. In this locker, there were guns.

I don't know any details, I don't remember what he told me, I just remember being handed a shotgun and being told how to use it. I remember the feel of that gun; nothing else. Nothing else mattered then, did it? He grabbed a gun as well, ammo, and some other shit that we probably needed.

We departed and drove somewhere. I don't...I can't remember where. Somewhere in Portsmouth, of course. I do know that it was somewhere that should not have had a fucking massive forest. The car stopped, and we were facing a gigantic, misty forest. The same type of forest in my dreams...

Walking towards it, on the gravel, shoes floating in the memory's haze. I can remember thinking "This is it." I had come to the conclusion that someone was going to die that night. Hell, I was going to make sure of that. Either Grey or me. I wasn't leaving without giving it my all. Funny how things never work out the way they were planned, but still. If I hadn't of resigned to that thinking, I probably wouldn't of given it my all.

Cloudy sky. No birds in sight. Completely gray, dull, lifeless. The only color was the flannel jacket Luca had decided to wear. Funny, he reminded me of a Hunter almost. He almost had a full beard, had a trucker hat on. And the shotgun, of course. Couldn't forget that.

We were in perfect unison. Somehow, I think perhaps Degausser opened itself in between us, and only us. We did not need to think. We were both pretty much the same person. You and I in unison.
Or perhaps it was just the pain working through us.

And then the counting started.
With each number, we quickened our pace.


Katelyn's lively face burned into our minds.


The unified screaming that night from Grey and whatever that other thing was.


The father, the son, and the holy spirit.


Luca and his parents, plus the Old Man.





We charged into the forest, ready to die. Our feet plunged through a mist that clung to the forest floor like carpet. No animals were in this, not in this type of one. We were in a dead forest.

We screamed along with each other while stomping into the forest.

"So, pray, little Kay;-"

I shouted, while spotting the mysterious sets of glaring red eyes among the trees ahead.

"-love's just God on a good day!!"

He yelled, while pointing his gun and firing into that area.

We ran into the dark, to see if we had hit what was certainly Grey.

"And you can't blame your mother!!!" 

We found nothing there but wires emerging from the ground, ready to stab into us.

"She's trying not to see you as her WORST MISTAKE."

With the tiny bit of Degaussing ability I had without the entirety of The 757 there, I created a tiny shield against the stabbing tentacles. The force from the blow still transferred through the shield and blew us back a little, but at least we weren't dead. We ignored the wires and continued into the forest.

"And I wish that I could tell you right now-"

This time, blue eyes appeared in the underbrush. These eyes seemed more...wild, in a way. Hard to explain. We got close enough to see a dark shape, with grayish blur I am going to assume was a mask, moving to the side of us, ready to pounce.


Luca's father fired off a round into the shape. The shape made some sort of noise that shook the trees around us. Almost like a primal howling. It jumped low to the forest floor, and looked like it was about to just do some sort of other type of pounce.

"But it looks like I won't be around!!"

 I jumped up over the creature, almost like an acrobat, and slammed down onto it with a Degaussed cube. The cube ripped into the creature, and almost seemed to stab into it. This...thing was moving so fast I could not really tell, and it fled back into the forest before I could finish killing it.

"So you won't know!!"

We recovered our original pace, and continued on into the jungle. We tried following the trail the creature that we had just met had left through the immediate area, but lost it quickly, so we continued on opposite the direction we had entered in.

"You won't know..."

The area between the trees seemed to get smaller, and yet the trees seemed to be growing closer together at the same time. It was like we were in another world at that moment. I wouldn't be surprised if we were...actually, I just thought about this, but we had probably entered the "William Tell" pocket universe. We had officially entered the challenge when we stepped into the forest.

"You won't know!!"

Until that point we had been running side by side most of the time. At that point, we were forced to split up. At that point, a barrage of the wires that accompany Grey fired towards us, ripping through trees and threatening to completely cut into our bodies.
"You won't know...!!"

He ran to the left, I ran to the right. In hindsight, Grey had probably been wanting to split us up.

I know everything from his perspective here on out because he knew it.

"So believe in me, believe-!!" I cried.

The wires appeared again to my left. They were attempting to catch up along my body at the right angle to either entangle me in the wires or stab directly into my chest and through my heart.

"-, if you think I'll let you down-" Luca's old man said.

Luca's father ran into a forest clearing, never stopping despite his heart threatening to burst in his chest. Despite the pain exploding inside of his lungs. Despite it all, he pushed through. And the wires that had cut him off? I felt the pain transfer through the bond we had forged as he let the wires stab through him.

"-well, I won't." I finished for him.

 I couldn't summon any Degausser objects or waves at that point in time, so I had to out maneuver the wires by myself. It wasn't that hard...I dodged by running in a wavy motion and running around trees as I passed them. The wires missed me; they either stabbed into the ground or got tangled up in the trees. With the wires taken care of, I tried running to help Luca's father.

"They can fire everything they've got-"

He grabbed onto the wires sticking into his body, and pulled on them, pulling the monster at the end of them into range. He readied his shotgun...

"and when you think I'm sunk-"

I swear I saw his flannel jacket before some wires surprised me and tripped me to the floor. The wires almost speared me in the gut, but I was able to deflect them with a bit of Degaussing energy. Not much; I was still spent, but enough to stop and divert their paths. I got back up and tried running again...

"-I will float on, ...and on!!!"

He shot directly into Grey's face. It blasted Grey back, toppling him almost like a tower. Grey fell to the ground, with a grin. He laughed, which angered Luca's dad. Pieces of the porcelain mask sprayed out all over the grass; there was no blood though. No face under that mask.

"I have burned the bush that covered my light!!"

I sensed the bond between us breaking. It felt almost as if he was being dragged away from the connection. He felt so far away. Grey wanted us separated.

"Even though I'm scared I won't burn that bright...." 

He threw his gun down. The idiot didn't want to bother reloading, so he just threw his gun down. He took out a knife he had packed along with the gun, and tackled into Grey. Grey giggled as if tickled when he was stabbed. He even moved around like it just tickled him.

If there was no human body, how was he stabbing into anything solid?

"But you won't know!!"

Grey pushed Luca's father off.

"You won't know..."

I began to realize what was starting to happen. And I also realized that I had ran past the same damn tree at least ten times by that point.

"You won't know!!!"

Grey laughed and laughed and laughed. Luca's father ignored the taunts, and tried stabbing again. Grey slapped Luca's father, with a force that sent him flying. And then...he brandished some type of weapon that us humans could not recognize with our sight. It was like a knife...but not...

"You won't know...!!"

I screamed out in pain...I could feel Grey. He was about to do something; the most painful thing anyone could ever experience. A pain that hurt worse than losing your own daughter in a crash, even.

Or at least, a pain that rivaled that.

He ran at Grey, attempting to slice him with the knife again; he was absorbed in his rage. The bond we had shared was almost completely gone by that point; I could only watch from within him.  Grey side stepped out of the way and kicked him across the clearing, and into the side of a tree.

And then Grey began to speak.

We're never gonna feel as full as we felt, 
so let's go outside, and we'll play "William Tell".
Take your time drawing your bead; I'll stand as still as you need.
'Cause you're so good at talking smack, you heart attack;
But you're the apple of my eye anyway...!!
And then he slashed the thing across Luca's father, and a scream almost inhuman echoed out of the clearing.

 My smiling face..
That's on my head...
That's on your silver plate.

Grey closed in and...did something. I don't know what. Something...something I don't think I could ever comprehend. I know it was something so painful, that it completely forced out and demolished every single little trace of the bond from Degausser.

I ran as fast as I could. Whatever spell that was forcing me to restart from that tree had quit, and now I was making actual headway towards the clearing. I was almost there when I was stopped again, by the other monster I had seen; the separate entity. "The Devil."

He tried slamming into me, but I jumped to the side. I saw the mask that The Devil had on, and just...couldn't recognize it. It was just a complete blur to my mind. And a power pulsated from that creature...indescribable. It completely broke Sowing Season....and I was scared. Fuck, I was scared.

But not defenseless. I turned all of my anger into one final wave, and shot it at the monster. Then, I used the gun to shoot into the monster's chest. I began running again, to help Luca's father.

I probably should have stayed and attempted to finish the job. Oh well.

The forest shrunk back. The trees retreated, and the clearing became a field. A recognizable field. Three trees were near us. We were in the field where the old I.C. Norcom High School had been. Which was really fucking strange, because the three trees next to us were the only trees in the entire field.

We were in a busy fucking section too. No one had noticed us fighting these mons-

Grey and his partner in crime were nowhere to be seen.

Luca's father laid there. Blood trickled out of the side of his mouth. He saw me, but also didn't see me. He could hardly comprehend anything, I think. I grabbed his hand, and then the sight of me finally clicked in his head. He looked at me again, with certainty. The blood leaked into his beard.

And then, his famous last words. I speak along with him, trying to comfort him.

"So they say, they say in heaven there's no husbands and wives..."

he pauses here, catches his breath.

"On the day that I show up, they'll be completely out, of their forgiveness supplies."

Tears well up in his eyes, and in mine as well.

"And I can't use the telephone tell you that I'm dead and gone...."

Our voices choke up while speaking, and the tears accelerate.

"So you won't know..."

He repeats this as I am sitting here, typing away into the computer. I am not in the field anymore. I had to leave his body there. I could not carry it.

You won't know.

I don't know what I

Yeah, you won't know.

I don't know what we're going to do. Grey's too strong.

Yeah, you won't know.

Fuck, there's a noise at the front door. Seems like someone's here.

Yeah, you won't know.

By the sound of their shoes, and how many...police...

Yeah, you won't know.

Coming up the stairs.

Yeah, you won't know.

I might as well go. I need to atone for this sin I've created.
I'm sorry, Katelyn.

Yeah, you wo